After receiving three calls from the orthopedic doctor over the past seven days, (all automated, reminding me about today’s appt. I was certain they were calling to cancel or relay some massive problem), I’m currently on my way for injection #1. This has been an exhausting process and I haven’t even had one of them yet.
My palpitations are OUT OF CONTROL today. I feel like my heart is bounding out of my chest. I’m wearing a fitness monitor (steps, miles, ridiculous heart rate). It’s gone from 80’s into the low 100’s, back to 70-something. Back up and then down again. And the fact that I’m so focused on it isn’t helping. Seriously. 😞
To make things even more fun, I’m on the subway, in a car surrounded by coughing, sniffling people. Ugh. Noooooooooo! And the conductor actually just said that our train was “being held because of delays on the train behind us.” What is happening?!?! That doesn’t even make sense. Welcome to a day in the life of a subway-riding New Yorker.
Just get me there already. Please!
Ok, I’ve finally arrived. After being set up in a treatment room, I begin waiting. And waiting. It probably wasn’t very long, but it felt like an eternity. Finally, a knock at the door. But it’s not my doctor. It’s a staff member. She told me that the doc had been called over to the main hospital for an emergency case. Would I mind if the physician’s assistant did the procedure? At first, I agreed. But as I waited for the PA, I started to panic-text my mom and sisters via our ongoing daily chain. Was I making a mistake? Should I wait? They convinced me to stay. If I trusted the PA, I should let him do it.
Turns out, it was the really nice guy who’d first interviewed me when I came to the office in September. The one who’d said that at least I was a nice person. LOL. He was very kind and explained everything he had to do for the gel injection. After being in the room for a minute, he said, “You look really anxious, so let’s get it over with. You just have to keep breathing.” Apparently both he and the nurse were under the impression that I wasn’t. I was made aware of that when she kept saying, “Breathe, my dear.” I thought I was. 🤷🏻♀️
The set up:
The sonogram machine:
The gel-filled syringe: 😬
After they’d cleaned the knee, set up the sonogram and used freezing spray that’s supposed to keep you from feeling the worst of the injection (I call BS on that, it doesn’t), Rob (the PA) did the procedure quickly and sat with me for a moment afterward. And – only because I asked – we talked about worst case scenarios, as in what if someone reacted badly to the gel? What do they do? The answer wasn’t pleasant, but it was logical. After that, they told me to wait a few more minutes before I got up, which I did. When I went to the office to retrieve my insurance card, I started to feel the skin on my left knee itch. A lot. Before leaving the office, I asked the receptionist to call Rob and ask if that was normal. Suddenly, there he was. After he reassured me about it, I left.
What I remember after that is spotty, mainly because the adrenaline that delivered me to the office had run out. I felt like lead. My exhaustion was so intense, all I wanted to do was lie down. I remember knowing that I wanted to take a shower. Before arriving at the hospital and after I left, it seemed like I’d been sneezed on/at/around, since I’d left my apartment. No amount of tiredness could stop my serious aversion to germs. 💁🏻♀️ Hey, at least I admit my complete overreaction to them. But aren’t people glad when I’m carrying a bulk pack of Wet Ones. LOL.
I got home. And then nothing…… I must have fallen asleep. The next thing I knew, my daughter was home from school and it was late. Thank goodness we had leftovers! That baked ziti was delicious the night before. It tasted even better last night since I only had to reheat it. ☺️
Although I didn’t go to sleep right away, I couldn’t even watch the pairs figure skating finals. I had to lie down. We’d all already exchanged our valentines and my daughter had gone back to her work. So I allowed myself to rest.
Sporadic sleeping……. woke up at 2:45…… back to sleep at 4:30….. up at 6:05 to get the day started.
My knee isn’t as swollen. Although the site burns to the touch, the stiffness and overall soreness has gone down a lot. So that’s that.
We went into Manhattan and, even though I’ve mostly rested over the past couple of days, my knee is sore. And it’s weird. The pain is on the inner aspect, under the kneecap. And the injection site (on the outside of my leg) is uncomfortable. The swelling is up a bit. I’m watching it closely. Maybe it’s because I haven’t done a lot of walking? Hmm.
Back to work! I’ve immersed myself in the show again. This time, I set up my table. No more laying everything out on the floor. In my defense, it was easier to use my extra-large cutting board on the floor. Laying out yards and yards of fabric on a flat surface. But sitting on the floor now would just be stupid. So I won’t.
So that’s that. We pick up where we leave off, just like always. This week, I had someone say how surprised they are at how normal I look, with pain and health issues happening underneath. It’s something that I’ve heard dozens of times over the years. Anyone with a so-called “invisible illness” will attest to that. “You look so healthy!” “You look so normal!” Whatever normal is. Yeah, I guess I do.
This was round one. Two more to go. 🤦🏻♀️ At least I know what to expect.
Wishing each of you a calm week. ❤️
Peace and painlessness,